Words Hurt

We've all been there.  We've all had someone say words that just makes us freeze in our own steps, make our mouths close and just sit there holding back tears because the pressure of the world seems to be all on our heart at that very moment.

This is when you know how much words hurt.

God has placed me in a waiting period.  No, I don't love it.  But I've learned to find grace during my waiting.  And that's exactly what I plan to continue to do.

The most amazing guy in the world had always been in my life.  But something changed in us and we realized how much we cared about each other.  Due to circumstances that neither of us could change, we had to go our separate ways.  The very next day is when I realized just what I had lost.  I lost the love of a lifetime.  I lost what I had prayed for every single day.  I lost my best friend.

People can tell you to pick up and date again, but until you are ready, you just can't.  Every time I try to talk to another guy, it's like God puts this guy back in my life.  Every time I think it's the end and I need to move on, I have a dream and he asks me to just wait a little longer.

I've finally given in to the fact that God wants me to wait this out.  And I'm okay with that.

But during the waiting, when someone tells you that you're wasting your time and this guy will never want to be with you, it hurts.  It hurts so deep.  I've been fighting back tears.

But what I have to remember is that God never said doing His will would be easy.

I've never been a go with the flow kind of girl.  I've always done my own thing.  Marched to the beat of my own drummer.  I've always had critics telling me that I'm not good enough or that I'll never find "the one" and I just need to settle.

Settling isn't good enough for me.  If God tells me to wait, He means it.  Not waiting could result in a not so happily ever after.  I want my amazing ending.  I want to my prince charming.

So although words hurt deep down, I have to remember that God can take that pain and make me stronger.  He can make me see the reason I choose this path.  He can keep my train on the tracks and keep me from derailing.  He will give me my happily ever after when He's ready.